Current location:	dorm room
Current mood:	thoughtful
Current music:	Warcraft 1 soundtrack
Entry tags:	thinking too much

To fight
For some reason, watching "Chuck" made me thoughtful. I almost always try to understand and refine myself in daily life, but recently I've been putting more effort into it, pending my diagnosis by Renee with some kind of learning disorder (I think).

It occurred to me while I was brushing my teeth after the episode that it is given to me to fight. I don't take things lying down often. When I was bullied, I fought back. The action was pointless, did nothing but keep my spirit from breaking and get me beaten up more, but I still fought. I fought because I saw nothing else to do. Because I would not knuckle under to the unfairness.

I inherited stubbornness from both sides of the family. My dad is more obviously stubborn, but my mom has a streak to match it, if you push her enough. Yet fighting and being stubborn is not always the right path.

God grants me the wisdom sometimes to look around, to see when I shouldn't be so aggressive. Some people are put off by such intensity on things that don't matter so much.

But in everyday life, it's a tricky thing. I'm reminded of a Harper motto I read in a book several years ago: In all things, there must be a balance.

Always keeping that in mind, I am glad I have the option to fight.